End of life Milestones

 

Misplaced treasures

 

At 79

One tends to spend

More time looking back

Than forward

(perhaps a sign that I need a new hobby).

 

I reflect on key moments

Milestones if you will

And yes,

I did have many successes

In my chosen field

(Or perhaps it chose me)

Yet, there were a plethora

Of setbacks too

Disappointments

(And dare I admit it)

Failures.

 

Still, it's the lost loves

I keep returning to

(Like my ex wife)

And oddly

The ones I never had

Possibilities

That I let slip by

If only I had done x...

 

It’s as though

The work

Which I allowed to consume me

Mattered not at all

And was only there to prop me up

While my real life played-out.

 

If only I’d been more aware of that.

 

The only milestone that really meant anything

Was the moment my only child was born

Without her

I think I’d be a very bitter

And regretful old man today.

 

In those days

Parents didn't spend the sort of

Interactive hours

That people do now

And though I do disagree

On other facets of modern parenting

(Like discipline and structure)

I do regret those missing hours.

 

Those early years especially

Just flew by

I seemed to miss so much.

 

We have made up for it since

I'm a very doting grandparent

Yet, I can't shake off the notion

That the greatest milestones

Are the ones

I never had.

 

 

31.1.21

  

From Us & Them and the things in-between

Speaking of old men, I read this fascinating study about them. It mirrors my experiences while working in a nursing home. Elderly women coped much better with their situation than men. Worth noting too that suicide among men over 75 is the highest bracket of all ages and genders. Read HERE

Usually I write however I'm feeling in the moment but this was written with an eye to a submission. 

Ginninderra Press were doing a call out for poems on the theme of Milestone for a book. I wrote this one. Then decided to write another. It was called Milestoned. I submitted the latter and it was accepted. It was put up near the front, so I was very happy.

I still liked this one so decided to include it in Us and Them. 

There's a new review of the book at Goodreads HERE

A.J. Langford Books